I've been contemplating moving back home.
Not because I can't handle living out in the 'real world' but because I want to save about $15 000 to pay off some debts and save up a bit. So, one year with the olds should help me save a bit right? Or even 2 years until my contract is up? Right?
I just think it would be really hard. I've gotten used to my freedom here, and I don't know if I'm going to be 'free' if I moved back home. I want to save the money, but I don't know if I want to give up my freedom. I think I'm just going to have to be really really strict with my money from now on. Be very vigilant and no extravagant spending what so ever.
Which will be so fucking hard.
I want to pay off my car and pay off my credit cards. And buy a personalised plate for my car. Not asking for much, am I?
And you. You know, you. Why are you doing this to me? Ug. I want to, but I don't. I do! No, I don't. I just want to know, do you? Cuz I do. Am I still on your list? You're not on mine, for obvious reasons. I don't want you to think about me, but do you? Oh, I hate when I get like this.
I've been thinking about Luke lately though. (He's online at the moment, but still, no 'hello'). I asked him if he'd like to catch up soon. The convo went like this:
Me: so they got you on day shift now?
Him: yeah. 7-5
Me: same kinda day as me.. 7.30-5.30
Me: so.. you got any plans this week? or any free time?
Him: working overtime!! gettin the dollars in b4 xmas/nyrs
Me: How about the weekend? do you want to catch up?
Him: weekend working. 12midday - 9pm sat and sunday
Me: you're working 7 days a week?
Him: well rostered 5 days and optional overtime weekends
Me: ok. so it looks like i won't be able to catch up with you until the new years..
Him: more than likely unless your going to the woodford folk festival
Me: unfortunately not... :(
Me: You still wanna catch up tho right?
Him: sure
Me: cool... well, if u don't have nye plans, let me know, and we might be able to hook up
And he didn't respond.
How do you read that? I read it like "I'm blowing you off for a while until I know what's going on.." Why can't I just get a straight answer from someone? Anyone? Ug. I'm just going to leave it alone. If he's interested, he'll come to me. I'm sick of chasing guys just to end up looking like a fucking fool.
I haven't had sex in 10 weeks, and yet, I'm not desperate.
Well, off to eat my dinner and drown in the TV. Leave me a note. I really do love you.
Erin
Missed one?
